Dccomics

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Idiosyncrasies Of My Man

Men, consolidate college loans cannot figure them out. I know that is what they usually say about us women. I do not hate men. Actually the opposite. I can truly say in all honesty I love the man I am with. However, thanks to him, well you will see.

When we first decided to move in together he had to remark about closet space. Ok, in all fairness giving him closet space is fine. He does actually hang up his clothes from time to time. So I gave him half the closet. What do I find. After complaining about needing closet space only mortgage loans quarter of it is used. My God, assist me if I invade the other three quarters not in use. It is like power tools. He needs them. Even if he probably will not use that particular power injury compensation Why do we have it? His version "one of these days we may just need it".

Home Depot, yes a wonderful place to go at times. He always looks like a kid in a candy store when we go there. Silly me I let him go to the power tools. He feels, fondles, drools and touches just about every tool there. I swear at times I wish I was a power tool.

Ok, I admit recently I had two "what the hell was I thinking"? moments. First I give him a machine to use. Cool. that is fine. He gets online. Great nothing wrong with that after all that is what they are for. Searching the web. Unfortunately for me he finds sears.com. Ut-oh! Which now explains the craftsman tool box on the way to our house. I do believe I received a "I love you" out of the deal. Ok, that one was not totally his fault. We needed to get a cordless drill for my brother. So off to Wal-Mart we go. We get to the tool isle. In all fairness to my life partner I had let him purchase a drill also. Sounds fair? Well yes. Could I have left it at that? Oh, no. I believe I suffered an alien mind melt at that point. Now I should know better by that time to never make eye dotnet web hosting with him. I got that dam look. The same look he gave me the first time that captured my heart. Somehow during my mind melt, not only did I let him purchase a few more tools, I helped him. I am accident at work compensation claim seeking counseling for that condition.

Like most persons in the world. We need our morning coffee fix. Now I happen to like coffee in the morning. Not colored water. His complaint is it is too strong. I must chuckle over that one. I have a big strong man here however he can not handle an innocent cup of coffee. So much for the stronger of the sex theory.

Then there is NASCAR Racing. Now personally I love racing. Lots of women do. Here is my complaint. If I was in labor with contractions three minutes apart. He would look at me with the straightest face and reply "can't you wait".

The best on my list is the television remote. He has to hold it. Like it is some sacred idol or something. My God if it becomes lost. He could probably seriously look at me and say "How can I change the channels now"? Smack to the back of the head. Of course, that remote thing gets worse. Unfortunately, we have Dish Network. So our little neat remote gives him the ability to rewind any event he wants. I think I sat through a rewind of a car crash sixty-two times before we went back to live television. I am so glad we have advanced technology. No, not really.

No matter what idiosyncrasies he has, I still love him. In spite of himself.